“Stop moving so much, my Lord, I can't get these pins in,” said the dark elf tailor.
“Sorry, Lazarus, I don't know if I like this shade of velvet. What else do you have?”
The dark elf sighed. He scooped up the pins and stabbed the cushion like an assassin stabs a victim in the back.
“This is as dark a grey as I could find my lord. You said the black was too shiny. And you felt it was a little cliche to go all black for the flowing robes,” Lazarus said.
“I know, I know. There is some value in darkness, but I've never embraced the whole Dark Lord thing. Do you have a medium gray with a hint if purple maybe, like a lavendar? And we can accent with a skull broach for the terror factor?” The Dark Lord Savagius had a momentous speech to give to his horde of orcs, goblins, dark elves, dark dwarves, and an occasional troll or two. These are the kinds of people that appreciate evil, but absolutely relish dramatic evil. Clothes make the villain, and Savagius wanted his declaration of war against the forces of men and goodness to be legendary.
“We can try this,” Lazarus brought over a bolt of purplish grey cloth, “it’s not as soft and lush as the velvet, but it might have a better flow when you do your final dramatic turn.”
Savagius reached out with a bony finger and wasn't altogether impressed. “It feels cheap...but it looks pretty good.”
The dark elf set to cutting the fabric as the Medium Gray Lord practiced his speechnin front of the full length mirror. He shook his fists in the air and yelled out, “WE WILL CRUSH...no, crush is weaksauce...We will ANNIHILATE...do you think my horde knows the word annihilate Lazarus?”
The elf looked up from his cloth cutting. “I'm sure they'll get the gist, my Lord.”
“Great, we’ll go with annihilate. What do you think, scepter or non scepter?” Salvagius asked raising a rod with a polished white skull.
“Definitely scepter...I'll paint some glow in the dark eyes in it too.”
“Perfect!” the Dark Lord giggled. A properly evil giggle.
“Here, try this on.”
The lord donned the broadcloth the elf had fashioned quickly.
“I just want to see how it flows,” the tailor said.
Salvagius grabbed the end of the robe with one hand and made a sudden turn. The fabric swung wildly and slapped against his legs in a flourish.
“That felt great! How did it look?” Salvagius asked.
“Magnificent, my Lord. The fabric is a little thin. I'll have to fashion an undergarment to hide your paunch.”
“Paunch, really?”
“Yes, my Dark Lord does enjoy his baked goods…” the elf trailed off.
“And the fried beasts, I know. Every great man has a weakness,” Salavagius twisted quickly and admired how the fabric swung. “I like it Lazarus, we can go with this material, but I feel it needs...something?” the Dark Lord squinted ad he looked at the garment.
“I know!!” he said, “it needs a scorpion, can you embroider a black scorpion on the back, and maybe some on the sleeves?”
“Yes, my lord,” the dark elf sighed, “I cam fashion wome scorpions…”
“Magnificent!”
“Sorry, Lazarus, I don't know if I like this shade of velvet. What else do you have?”
The dark elf sighed. He scooped up the pins and stabbed the cushion like an assassin stabs a victim in the back.
“This is as dark a grey as I could find my lord. You said the black was too shiny. And you felt it was a little cliche to go all black for the flowing robes,” Lazarus said.
“I know, I know. There is some value in darkness, but I've never embraced the whole Dark Lord thing. Do you have a medium gray with a hint if purple maybe, like a lavendar? And we can accent with a skull broach for the terror factor?” The Dark Lord Savagius had a momentous speech to give to his horde of orcs, goblins, dark elves, dark dwarves, and an occasional troll or two. These are the kinds of people that appreciate evil, but absolutely relish dramatic evil. Clothes make the villain, and Savagius wanted his declaration of war against the forces of men and goodness to be legendary.
“We can try this,” Lazarus brought over a bolt of purplish grey cloth, “it’s not as soft and lush as the velvet, but it might have a better flow when you do your final dramatic turn.”
Savagius reached out with a bony finger and wasn't altogether impressed. “It feels cheap...but it looks pretty good.”
The dark elf set to cutting the fabric as the Medium Gray Lord practiced his speechnin front of the full length mirror. He shook his fists in the air and yelled out, “WE WILL CRUSH...no, crush is weaksauce...We will ANNIHILATE...do you think my horde knows the word annihilate Lazarus?”
The elf looked up from his cloth cutting. “I'm sure they'll get the gist, my Lord.”
“Great, we’ll go with annihilate. What do you think, scepter or non scepter?” Salvagius asked raising a rod with a polished white skull.
“Definitely scepter...I'll paint some glow in the dark eyes in it too.”
“Perfect!” the Dark Lord giggled. A properly evil giggle.
“Here, try this on.”
The lord donned the broadcloth the elf had fashioned quickly.
“I just want to see how it flows,” the tailor said.
Salvagius grabbed the end of the robe with one hand and made a sudden turn. The fabric swung wildly and slapped against his legs in a flourish.
“That felt great! How did it look?” Salvagius asked.
“Magnificent, my Lord. The fabric is a little thin. I'll have to fashion an undergarment to hide your paunch.”
“Paunch, really?”
“Yes, my Dark Lord does enjoy his baked goods…” the elf trailed off.
“And the fried beasts, I know. Every great man has a weakness,” Salavagius twisted quickly and admired how the fabric swung. “I like it Lazarus, we can go with this material, but I feel it needs...something?” the Dark Lord squinted ad he looked at the garment.
“I know!!” he said, “it needs a scorpion, can you embroider a black scorpion on the back, and maybe some on the sleeves?”
“Yes, my lord,” the dark elf sighed, “I cam fashion wome scorpions…”
“Magnificent!”